Funny Things about College Students

 

YOU MIGHT BE A COLLEGE STUDENT

1.If you have ever price shopped for Top Ramen, you might be a college student.

2.If you live in a house with three couches, none of which match.

3.If you consider Mac and Cheese a balanced meal.

4.If you have ever written a check for 45 cents.

5.If you have a fine collection of domestic beer bottles.

6.If you have ever seen two consecutive sunrises without sleeping.

7.If your glass set is composed of McDonald’s Extra Value Meal Plastic Cups (ie.Olympic Dream Team I or II).

8.If your underwear supply dictates the time between laundry loads.

9.If you cannot remember when you last washed your car.

10.If you can pack your worldly possessions into the back of a pick-up (one trip).

11.If you have ever had to justify yourself for buying Natural Light.

12.If the first thing you do in the morning is roll over and introduce yourself.

13.If you average less than 3 hours of sleep a night.

14.If your trash is overflowing and your bank account isn’t

15.If you go to Wal-Mart more than 3 times a week

16.If you eat at the cafeteria because it’s “free”, even though it sucks

17.If you are personally keeping the local pizza place from bankruptcy

18.If you wake up 10 minutes before class

19.If you wear the same jeans 13 days in a row — without washing them

20.If your breakfast consists of a coke on the way to class

21.If your social life consists of a date with the library

22.If your idea of “doing your hair” is putting on a baseball cap

23.If it takes a shovel to find the floor of your room

24.If you carry less than a dollar on you at all times because that’s all you have

25.If you haven’t done laundry in so long you are wearing your swim suit to class

26.If your midnight snack is microwave popcorn

27.If you celebrate when you find a quarter

28.If your room is so cold that your toilet freezes over

29.If your walls are plastered with posters of half naked men or women (whichever your preference)

30.If you have built up a tolerance for certain beverages

31.If you wear a sweat suit for so long that it stands up by itself

32.If your backpack is giving you Scoliosis

33.If you get more sleep in class than in your room

34.If your idea of feeding the poor is buying yourself some Ramen noodles

35.If you can sleep through your roommate’s blaring stereo

36.If you live in an area that is smaller than most mobile homes

37.If you get more e-mail than mail

BEFORE I CAME TO COLLEGE I WISH I HAD KNOWN…

– that it didn’t matter how late I scheduled my first class I’d seep light through it

– that I would change so much and barely realize it

– that you can love a lot of people in a lot of different ways

– that college kids throw airplanes, too

– that if you wear polyester everyone will ask you why you’re so dressed up

– that every clock on campus shows a different time

– that if you were smart in high school – so what?

– that I would go to a party the night before a final

– that chem labs require more time than all my other classes put together

– that you can know everything and fail a test

– that you can know nothing and ace a test

– that I could get used to almost anything I found out about my roomie

– that home is a great place to visit

– that most of my education would be obtained outside my classes

– that friendship is more than getting drunk together

– that I would be one of those people my parents warned me about

– that free food served at 10:00 is gone by 9:50

– that Sunday is a figment of the world’s imagination

– that psychology is really biology, biology is really chemistry, chemistry is really physics, and physics is really math

– that it is a really good idea to go places alone

– that it’s possible to be alone even when you’re surrounded by friends

– that friends are what makes this place worthwhile!

– don’t be dismayed at goodbyes

– a farewell is necessary before we can meet again, and meeting again, after moments or a lifetime, is certain for those who are friends.

College habits you can bring home

Try to use your dorm key to unlock your bedroom door.

Have your mom scan your ID card for meals.

Look for a tray to carry your dinner to the table with.

Walk two blocks to go to dinner.

Forget to dial the first three digits of your friend’s phone number.

Dial 9 when calling out of your house.

Use your calling card when calling your friends.

Walk to the post office to get your mail.

Yell “FLUSH!”

Jump out of the shower just in case someone does flush.

Try to latch the bathroom door because you think you’re in a stall.

Take all your shower items to and from your room.

Get dressed in the dark.

Go nuts looking for the quarter slots on the washing machine.

Make junk food runs at 11:30 at night.

Make popcorn just because you miss the smell.

Order pizza every Friday night.

Have one of your friends spend the night because you can’t sleep in a room by yourself.

Move another bed, dresser, and desk into your room because there is too much extra space.

Hang pictures of your college friends on the wall so you don’t miss them.

Hoard food under your bed for when it snows and you don’t want to go out.

Walk around the neighborhood looking for a computer lab (e-mail withdrawal).

Fight your mother for quarters for the imaginary snack machine and pay phone in the house

 

 

 

 

Source: www.angelfire.com